"The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anaïs Nin
The Cross of Acumen- star date 4026.6
To the distinguished orator of the bald sector
Wizened Priest of Proprietary Advancement for the Betterment of Intellect
Second Class Alpha Romeo.
It has been brought to our attention
that Alpha and Omega are in dire need
of follicles. No reds left. And the browns are rapidly dwindling
only the bleached blonds are still abundant
Whether this is sufficient cause for alarm is debatable
since we still have ample blues, lavender and green
at the Hair Bank in Geneva.
Future transplants have been relegated
to the gamma quadrant chartreuse sector
nine parsecs away in the Gamma-Orion system
For the seasoned helmsman
take a left at Saturn’s third ring
and hang right for about
two hundred years
that should get you there just in time for
a Soylent Green dinner
and the meeting for the better understanding of
learned and bald high priests.
Do remember not to shave
before you beam down to the planet
should you have any hair left on your body
it is a cinch
you will be reassigned
to the nubby nymph seminar
taking place at the same time
One word of caution
at the seminar is strictly verboten
lips have been detached
and tongues completely severed
keep your typing fingers
in your pockets
especially the digitus secundus
as we are not responsible
for any loss of extremity incurred
on this top secret mission to the far reaches of the galaxy.
Truth and opinion
can be misconstrued
as a lethal weapon
within nubby gnarly nymph lands.
Remember your primary objective
is to harvest the red and brown hair, which by the way is exceptional
and refrain from any and all philosophy…
Keep your principles and ideas hermetically zipped or experience the consequences.