Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Amazon Cloud

Just think
a cloud in cyberspace
pink and fluffy
no storms
no lightning
no rain
just white wispy platforms
floating in a blue field.

And you are tiny—and SKINNY
safely spinning round
smiling and laughing
and dancing to
the syncopated
do wop day glow
of a Bali autumn night.

Diddly bop
Scooby dooby doo
scaz fraz, raz ma taz and you are caught-up
in a time warp
where everyone is young
and a half dozen orthopedic shoes
swing on a clothesline along with
black and white oxfords
and toe shoes

Daddle waddle ding dong
shoo-do-doo- woosh wow whee,
bam-bub-bee, zoosk zoos-zingin
And now you are in Macchu Picchu
twisting with Chubby Checker
and you get it—you’re connected to the source.

Blaze a blingin
tootin and scootin
without a care
tripping lightly
down the stair
with long flaxen hair
flawless skin
and your butt, hips and thighs
make grown men drool
cause your flying without a license
fresh out of school
you are so cool
and SOOO flexible.

Then you sneeze
and break the spell
and you are back
but for a few syncopated moments
you were at the center of the cosmos.

A universe unto yourself and
it was HEAVEN
and Life is Like That
when your head is in a cloud
and you’re wearing rose colored reading glasses
and earphones with a mic.

Can you hear me now?
Shimmy shimmy
bing bang bong.
Crank it up, Babe
I can still hear myself

Monday, September 26, 2011

Sunday, September 25, 2011


that you toss 
the could have had
avoid all the should have’s
not matter what the price don’t make 
a fuss.

It glares through your eyes
and into your brain
cheering you on
discouraging you from 
drawing undue attention to it 
or making waves.
It is a coward
droning its mantra
into your ear 
until you believe 
uniting with others who feel as you do
accepting it as fact
distrusting your basic instincts
no longer seeking help
or listening to reason.

you into acceptance and apathy
It will have you 
acknowledging that it is selfless
seducing you for your own good
insisting that you follow its lead
persuading finally 
that you come quietly
and not argue.
Altering forever
what would have been
into what must be.

**Inspired by Happy Family—a film at the Italian Film Festival in Honolulu.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

A Quiet Life—Una Vita Tranquilla

A Quiet Life
tortures  you
in unexpected ways
It leads you on
like a hot babe
with her long legs
around your mid-section
pulling you into her
and just when you think
you can’t take any more
she slices your thumb off
and lets you run around in circles
howling WHY did you do that
WHY couldn’t you just LEAVE ME ALONE?
I’ve been good!
I’ve been good for fifteen years
I’ve started a new life
a new family
why couldn’t you
just leave me alone?
And she replies…

** This movie is at the Italian Film Festival.
The story of a good family gone wrong. A man escapes to Germany and starts a new family thinking he will finally enjoy a quiet life. He is wrong.

Friday, September 23, 2011

18 Years Later

not speaking
for 18 years,
a lifetime wasted
on misunderstanding
missed opportunity and
fate.  Reunited finally
by driving their father’s Morgan car
to Calabria to spread his remains.  


**  I went to the Italian Film Festival yesterday and saw this comedy—18 Years Later was very good and extremely funny.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Dryer Woes

My dryer's vent
came through 
the colonoscopy okay
she was wide awake and talking
for the whole operation.
No drugs were used 
or animals
during this procedure.

We had to go in and
surgically remove
several large polyps
with a rather long, hooded
sans camera. 

Dr. D. is a genius.

She had been feeling
sluggish of late
complaining of
and irritable bowel syndrome
couldn’t dry any
jeans past the damp stage.

After the operation
she was able to sit up 
and we are happy to report
although she did experience 
some lint laden hiccups
she did finally facilitate a 
dryer event.

Poor dear
she’s relaxing comfortably
for the moment,
she doesn’t know yet
about the follow-up surgery
scheduled for next year. 
She’s been spewing non-stop 
hot about 
hooking up
with a young energy saver
with tight abs.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011


like it was your last
edgy poem.

Have them hanging
for that morsel
that one
that single
tiny nugget
that is pure gold.
And command
their silence.

Make them stand at attention
click their heels
proving yet again
that you are much more
than sexy sizzling hot
much more
than a High School diploma
and a middle aged grandmother. Much more than a
bank of knowledge
to borrow or
withdraw from.

and then…
into the horizon
make them think it was a dream
like a brilliant autumn leaf carried away
by the breeze
colorful and rustling
sprawling splendidly
in the gifted forest
by a doe
in the dark.

Monday, September 19, 2011

Golf Rant

Golf makes me ponder
life’s eternal mysteries
and scratch my head
how hard can it be
to hit a stationary object
from a stationary position
with the sun shining in your eyes
three hundred and fifty yards from a four-inch hole?

Did I mention
that you have to swing with
your inferior hand and arm
not the one you are used to using 
the arm and hand that has a mind of its own
that would bitch slap you if it could
and who is the jackass who invented this game anyway?

I mean, whose idea it was
to sink a white-dimpled ball into a four-inch hole
in FOUR strokes or less
two of those strokes being putts?

Putting is a key component of mastering the game
because that hole
is getting smaller as we speak
and don’t tell anyone this
but I saw the hole move
to the right 
on more than one occasion
and it’s always after I make my putt
And No, I wasn’t drinking!

This makes me think
that you have to be either manic 
or a serious alcoholic
to keep up 
with moving holes, undulating greens, and passing cloud bursts
because on the off chance 
that you aren’t either of those
you would have to 
spend every spare moment
or LIVE ON the Golf Course
and we all know that people who live on golf courses
don’t play golf
because those little white balls
crash through their windows
from time to time 
annoying the family pet
who has more pressing things on his mind
like how to get out of the weekly
grooming appointment
because darling Mr. Pepper
doesn’t do Frufuu
and he ain’t wearing
No Stinkin Pink Bows!

So that wayward golf ball 
crashing through the window
could set this stressed-out canine off
resulting in some pretty nasty repercussions
like rapid-fire barking and
confiscating said golf ball 
producing a domino effect
witnessed by other stressed out golfers 
intent on hitting
their stationary ball
now distracted
and missing their shot
aiming instead at 
the aforementioned poodle
with the pink bow
who has a white golf ball
in his mouth
and won’t let the said player
have it back 
who in turn
won’t let anyone else play through.

Now have I mentioned 
that the rules state 
to play the ball as it lies
or take a two-stroke penalty?

I mean, have you heard of anything dumber
then playing a game where
you are expected to penalize yourself
AND be honest about it?

I’ll give you a minute to think about it.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Beavers Spotted on the I-70

Trucker lingo
confirms a Big 10-4
eyeballs a carload of beavers

CB Radio--Truckers way of communicating--popular in 70-80's
Big 10-4- totally agree

Beaver Sighting

Bandit: Breaker, breaker--This is the Bandit, I got the hammer on the floor and looking for more on the I-70 heading west at mile marker 95 coming out of Kansas City—on channel 2-4 anyone got their ears on, come back?
Rock: You got the Rock on channel 2-4 heading towards Denver; I’m at the front door–mile marker 100 heading west. Bandit change to channel 2-2, come back.
Bandit: 10-4, changing to 2-2. Rock this is the Bandit, I got the back door–seen any bears in them woods- come back?
Rock: Ease back on that hammer Bandit we got a Papa bear in a plain brown wrapper at the 99 mile marker, come back.
Bandit: Thank you kindly Rock. Whatcha hauling, come back?
Rock: Life is better with Coca Cola, come back.
Bandit: I’m at the Ball Park with some Angus beef franks, come back.
Rock: Bandit, we got a beaver sighting at the 103 mile marker doing a double nickel—repeat a pack of beavers coming at you with their top down. Got a pink one and the sun is shining bright, come back.
Bandit: Repeat, did you say a beaver pack, come back?
Rock: Should be coming up real soon—four beavers with their top down in a shiny red convertible, come back.
Bandit: That’s a big 10-4, Rock– and they’re smokin hot.
Rock: I’m heading to the Golden State of California, come back– been rolling since 3am.
Bandit: 10-4, hooking up in Wyoming the Equality State—gonna suds ‘em up and find me a sleeper leaper at the pickle park, come back.
Rock: That’s a big 10-4, I’m dancing solo—got me a honey back in San Antonio.
Bandit: Roger that Rock, thank you kindly, this is the Bandit signing off-catch you on the flip flop.
Rock: That’s an affirmative Bandit, Breaker, breaker--you got the Rock heading west at mile marker 175 keep your wheels on the ground and your tool well oiled—anybody out there got their ears on, come back?
CB Radio Slang
On the floor and looking for more: accelerating to full speed
Front door: first truck in the convoy
Back door: last truck in the convoy
Double nickel: 55 miles per hour
Papa Bear- State police
Plain brown wrapper: unmarked brown vehicle
Beaver: woman
Flip flop: on the return trip
Sleeper leaper: working girl
Pickle park: rest area known for working girls
Suds: beer

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